Athlete Tweets Review 07/29/10

  • Thursday, July 29, 2010 5:07 PM
  • Written By: Katie Tang
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Bryan Clay
"On my way to Disneyland w/the kids. But had to be stopped on the way out the door by drug testers! They always have great timing! #fb"

How I See It: Better to be stopped before going to Disneyland than at Disneyland. Imagine getting busted in the happiest place in the world.

Ticha Penicheiro
"I did some serious window shopping on this bus!! Lmao Ok...time to shower and find me some good food!!!"

How I See It: It's okay, Ticha. I did enough shopping today for the both of us.

Rhys Lloyd
"Camp bound. Heading to Mankato/Gonna be board, no xbox, no guitar.."

How I See It: Uh, ever heard of reading?

Cappie Pondexter
"Thnks for givin my mom bday love yah she appreciates it"

How I See It: Better to be a motherlover than a mother ... well, you know the rest (I'm looking at you, Delonte West).

Ryan Bader
"Trees down, roads flooded, and the worst drivers in the U.S. When it rains. Dangerous out here http://twitvid.com/8WLOA"

How I See It: Because it's soooo safe to drive and record a video at the same time, right?

Donte Whitner
"I should be the official tweeter of the buffalo bills HA"

How I See It: Bills' fans don't need constant updates about our mediocrity, but thanks for the offer, Donte!

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Athlete Tweets Review 07/27/10

  • Tuesday, July 27, 2010 6:18 PM
  • Written By: Kenny Legan
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Natalie Coughlin
"Poor Dozer just learned (the hard way) that bees sting when you try to bite them. He's okay, just swollen. http://tweetphoto.com/35265596"

How I See It: Phew ... it's okay, Barack, you can go back to doing things that presidents do. Natalie's dog is going to be okay. That's for letting us know, Natalie.

Chad Ochocinco
"@terrellowens we like batman n robin, siskel n ebert, ying n yang, bonnie n clyde but you're bonnie though"

How I See It: It's not clear who's Robin.

Dwyane Wade
"4 everyone who wants 2 know. I luv marquette & alwayz will. I also luv coach crean whr he goes ill always support him. I'm not in the nba...(2nd Tweet)...Witout tht guy. So IU shorts I will b wearing as well..thanks for the concern."

How I See It: This is a daily double bonus tweet. Does this mean D-Wade will start wearing Lakers gear because he couldn't have won a championship without Shaq?

Kenny Moore
"89 freakn cheats in NASCAR racing video games! Bout to get this victory!!!"

How I See It: So that's how Jimmie Johnson keeps winning ...

John Daly
"On Air right now with ESPN New York Bill Daughtry & Don LaGreca promoting my album"

How I See It: Two Things: 1) Could we actually turn on the show and see John Daly tweet this live? and 2) There's no way John Daly is coming out with a MUSICAL album. It has to be some photo album of all the crazy pants he's worn. If it is music, this could be a bigger disaster than ... John Daly.

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Athlete Tweets Review 07/26/10

  • Monday, July 26, 2010 6:43 PM
  • Written By: Stanley Kay
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Nick Barnett
"Watching NFL live getting excited!!! Got my work done early now just bored... So every time commercials come on 50 pushups!! Leeggoooooo"

How I See It: I do the same thing with commercials and pushups when I watch HBO. No commercials, but still.

Russell Okung
"So I have a question for all of you. Are you living or are you existing?"

How I See It: Somebody has a little Andy Dufresne in him.

Matt Forte
"@Jones_Drew32 I got you Batman... I'm healthy!"

How I See It: Batman? Maurice Jones-Drew is the true identity of the Dark Knight?

Donte Whitner
"In LIFE u don't find a way to win...u MAKE a way to win!"

How I See It:That must be why Whitner’s Bills are so good.

Kawika Mitchell
"What up world? Camp #8 and Buffalo Bills 2010 ready for takeoff. B n Buffalo tomorrow and n Rochester on Wednesday. Is Rochester ready 4 us?"

How I See It:Better question: Are you ready for Rochester?

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Athlete Tweets Review 07/25/10

  • Monday, July 26, 2010 4:05 AM
  • Written By: Stanley Kay
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Candace Parker
"Bout to kill dis ms pac man right quick..."

How I See It: Whose side are you on anyways?

Stylez G. White
"Can't, I have training camp my dude"

How I See It: Classic excuse. It’s the new “I’m not feeling well.”

Darnell Dockett
"After listening to Baby from cash money I'm gonna go buy me a studio cuz I knoow I can rap better than him... Who's you top 5 worst rappers?"

How I See It: Is Ron Artest eligible?

Mike Tyson
"Watch the show Entourage next week for a surprise guest."

How I See It:Can’t guess who it’s going to be.

Fabian Washington
"Nite nite world. My body is starting to crash from all the Redbull I drank today. Woooooooooooo"

How I See It: But Red Bull gives you wings, so crash averted.

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Athlete Tweets Review 07/22/10

  • Thursday, July 22, 2010 3:17 PM
  • Written By: Katie Tang
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Trent Shelton
"You get alot of friends when you say, you got some GaGa tickets lol...Then they want them for Free! #childplease! lol"

How I See It: Easiest way to tell the real friends versus the fakers: Invite them to a Washington Redskins game in addition to the concert. All you'll hear are crickets.

Kenny Moore
"Will somebody please turn the heat off outside! Goodness"

How I See It: According to Inception, Leo DiCaprio controls everything. I'll pass along the message.

Kris Humphries
"Got my new golf clubs, gonna get my game right."

How I See It: You're going to need it. After going 12-70 this year, I'm predicting several lengthy upcoming off-seasons.

Joe Lauzon
"#Gmail is amazing. Sent an email and said "I have attached" but forgot to attach the image. So it asked me if I forgot."

How I See It: In addition to taking over the world, Google can now take over your mind.

Michael Waltrip
"im thinking Hooters for lunch. they have great food."

How I See It: And you probably read Playboy for the articles too, huh?

Alana Beard
"Just saw a guy walkin down the street in DC with 2 NY size rats on his shoulders! Can we say insane? I literally closed my eyes and drove by"

How I See It: Who needs shoulder pads when you can wear fall's hottest new accessory, shoulder rats?

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Athlete Tweets Review 07/21/10

  • Wednesday, July 21, 2010 12:40 PM
  • Written By: Dan Hurwitz
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Hakim Warrick
"State troopers pulling ppl over n unmarked chargers.... Isn't tht entrapment or something?"

It just ain't right.

Donte Whitner
"Are u guys having a good day? I am...olive garden then NAP TIME"

All you can eat salad and bread sticks.

Brian Cushing
"people can't drive in new York city"

How I See It: You are getting spoiled in Houston.

Michael Griffin
"@ChrisJohnson28 call me when you get a chance"

How I See It: Call me also, Chris.

Darnell Dockett
"I'm hungry, I wants pancakes, cheese grits, turkey sausage, 4scrambled eggs, apple juice, and a USA today paper w/a cigar!!"

How I See It: Maybe you should be the spokesman for Denny's.

Amare Stoudemire
"Boker Tov !! People. Have a great day. I'm done with a weight lift, next stop Basketball Court. All ways working. Shalom."

How I See It: New York already making you a little Jewish. This could be my favorite tweet ever!

Athlete Tweets Review 07/20/10

  • Tuesday, July 20, 2010 4:37 PM
  • Written By: Kenny Legan
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William Blackmon
"Maybach 3"

How I See It: Oh hey I'm thinking of buying a car ... Oh yeah, which one? ... Just a Maybach 3 ... What's that like, four games salary? ... Something like that ... No big deal.

Bernard Berrian
"I feel like twitter stalkin the hell outta someone. Who shall it be??"

How I See It: Ashton Kutcher.

Shannon Miller
"Got on the elliptical this morning and started accepting friend requests on facebook, it's a whole new world!"

How I See It: Wow at the same time?! Next up, solving the BP oil spill at spin class.

Rebecca Soni
"Practice, weights and first yoga class at @YogaWorks! Nice to be home after a long morning. Now spending some quality time with a plumber :/ "

How I See It: I guess when your office is a pool of water there's a lot of internal plumbing that needs to be done.

Donte Whitner
"Mosquitos are killing again. Be careful people! "

How I See It: Wow, even multimillionaire athletes get bitten by mosquitoes. Guess their skin isn't made of gold after all.

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Athlete Tweets Review 07/19/10

  • Monday, July 19, 2010 4:58 PM
  • Written By: Katie Tang
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Joffrey Lupul
"Kovalchuk chooses "Jersey Shore" over "The Hills" and apparently has no plans on ever aging."

How I See It: I don't mind Kovalchuk's choice. Everyone knows The Situation throws better parties than Speidi.

Shelden Williams
"Is it wrong to "play fetch" with your child to get them tired? Haha"

How I See It: It's fine, children are just like dogs: They both chew on toys, have high-pitched squeals and urinate outside ... oh wait.

Donte Whitner
"THIS is gonna be a GREAT season Bills fans...ur happiness has arrived hahaha"

How I See It: You better be right about that, Donte. No one wants a repeat of McKelvin-gate.

Ty Lawson
"im sorry chipotle i cheated on u with qdoba... but listen i promise i wont do it ever again...qdoba dont taste like u do.. #thatisall"

How I See It: Looks like someone takes their food very, very seriously.

Forrest Griffin
"What's the great American food: fried chicken. Corn. Pork fat friedcollard greens. BBQ ribs."

How I See It: And people wonder why America has a high obesity rate.

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Athlete Tweets Review 07/16/10

  • Friday, July 16, 2010 6:58 PM
  • Written By: Dallas Wright
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Candace Parker
"Introducing @sheldenwilliams to THE best radio station in the country....WGCI ooo and dot that i ! 107.5 :)"

How I See It: Introducing all you all out there to THE finest player in the WNBA.

Tyreke Evans
"Follow my brother @docevans23 and my trainer @TyrekesTrainer"

How I See It: The cost of being an NBA trainer = your identity.

Brandon Carr
"Definitely jus got played by Mrs. Butterworth like Craig did with his cereal on Friday! Smh"

How I See It: A+ for effort on the Friday reference.

Connor Barwin
"#nowplaying r. Kelly - bump n grind"

How I See It: A little early, no?

Zab Judah
"R yall ready as I am???"

How I See It: Yeah I guess. You're making me nervous though, Zab.

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Athlete Tweets Review 07/15/10

  • Thursday, July 15, 2010 3:17 PM
  • Written By: Katie Tang
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Darnell Dockett
"I'm in LA I'm bout to jog down rodell drive in some tights and no shirt. And the first actress I see I'm gonna run up and kiss her!"

How I See It: Worked out pretty well for Adrien Brody after winning his Oscar. Crossing my fingers you get Lindsey Lohan.

Ian Stewart
"Scrambled eggs w/ cheese, sausage, bacon, hash brown casserole, biscuits and gravy and some sweet tea..my favorite meal."

How I See It: And here I was thinking Wheaties was the breakfast of champions.

Kerry Keating
"I'll say this after using the iPad and wifi on a plane for 3 hours. The battery is good. Only used 36% of it, with video, net, & kindle"

How I See It: Ladies and gentlemen, say hello to Apple's newest spokesperson, Kerry Keating!

Floyd Mayweather, Jr.
"damn it is hot as hell in vegas!!!"

How I See It: Well, it IS the city of sin, so I guess that makes sense.

Leigh Bodden
"In-N-out"

How I See It: I hope you got a double-double, animal style. YUM.

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Athlete Tweets Review 07/14/10

  • Wednesday, July 14, 2010 5:09 PM
  • Written By: Dan Hurwitz
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Cole Aldrich
"Just wanted to thank the weather in Minnesota for getting my flight cancelled.."

I don't blame you, Cole. I'd like to stay away from there also.

Ticha Penicheiro
"I wanna be in LA right now and go to ESPY's!!!! :-/ "

Maybe you should be better at your sport and you can go next year.

Jozy Altidore
"Who's going to watch the ESPYS tonight? Should be a lot of fun! #Espys "

How I See It: Probably no one will be watching the Espys. Who cares?

Glen Davis
"Sometimes I feel like I should be a pre- school teacher!!! Ayo baby!! Burning love basketball to much!!! "

How I See It: You in pre-school would make more like a Big Baby.

Gerald McCoy
"Look out world! "

How I See It: For what?

Michael Huff
"All I got to say is if you want it in NCAA 2011 ill be whoopin ass all night....pause"

How I See It: Can we both play as Texas?

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Athlete Tweets Review 07/12/10

  • Tuesday, July 13, 2010 9:02 AM
  • Written By: Stanley Kay
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Braylon Edwards
"4 Sure Bro RT @Mark_Sanchez: @OfficialBraylon Lots of sun waiting for you when you get here. Catch you tomorrow"

How I See It: You might catch Braylon tomorrow, but he won’t be able to catch you.

Charlie Villanueva
"Life is 10% what happens to you, 90% how you respond. I played my heart out with the best of my physical ability. I remain a proud Dominican"

How I See It: Best of your physical ability? Based on last year in Detroit, I guess you don’t have much physical ability.

Joffrey Lupul
"If you think you're angry, you're not... compared to Mel Gibson.."

How I See It: Hopefully Mel Gibson didn’t read this tweet.

Evan Bates
"watching MLB all-star weekend. mc hammer just hit a home run. what is going on here?!"

How I See It: Wait does MC Hammer’s home run help the NL or AL get home-field advantage in the World Series?

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Athlete Tweets Review 07/11/10

  • Monday, July 12, 2010 9:19 AM
  • Written By: Stanley Kay
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DeMar DeRozan
"The NBA..."

How I See It: ... All-Star game should just be Heat-Lakers next year.

Renee Montgomery
"#wewasgooduntil I found out you got babies all over the country."

How I See It: Don’t you dare talk about Travis Henry like that.

Bernard Berrian
"U smell like the ocean in winter #PickUpLines"

How I See It:Works all the time.

Keith Eloi
"PISSED RIGHT NOW!!!!"

How I See It: Somebody's a Knicks fan. There's always the summer of 2011!

Chris Paul
"Card game..."

How I See It: NBA players and card games ... never ends badly.

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Athlete Tweets Review 07/08/10

  • Thursday, July 8, 2010 2:51 PM
  • Written By: Katie Tang
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Ray Rice
"Just found out The Rock and Vin Diesel doing a movie in the hotel I'm staying at I'm going to audition for a role (career after football)"

How I See It: If you want a movie career after football, step one: Don't star in a movie with The Rock and Vin Diesel.

Steve Nash
"If you haven't been to the equator, try NYC this time of year."

How I See It: Don't forget to bring your sunscreen.

Serena Williams
"@Venuseswilliams can u let me know when u r going to ask the question?? I wanna win a signed copy of your book. Really I just wanna win!!"

How I See It: First Wimbledon and now this. Don't let Serena win something else of yours, Venus!

Matt Antonelli
"I think Lebron should come play wide receiver for the Pats...Championship"

How I See It: LeBron can bring his crown, but Brady still has three rings to show off he can win the big games.

Brittany Lincicome
"What do u think about my hamburger earrings?!?I have great earrings the next 2 days as well http://tweetphoto.com/31510331"

How I See It: Make sure you don't get near Mike Tyson. He doesn't need any more reason to bite off someone's ear.

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Athlete Tweets Review 07/07/10

  • Wednesday, July 7, 2010 9:36 PM
  • Written By: Dan Hurwitz
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Dwyane Wade
"Miami-Wade County. Thank you."

How I See It: The party on South Beach has begun.

Chris Bosh
"MIAMI HEAT!!!!!!!!!"

How I See It: Time to trade in your parka for a Speedo.

Dwyane Wade
"The highs & lows of life. Smh. I went from announcing my comeback 2 Wade county w/ @chrisbosh 2 the dentist chair gettn a root canal"

How I See It: Don't forget to brush and floss.

Chris Bosh
"Today has been amazing! There's so much to do now."

How I See It: Remember that Miami is expensive. Never mind, you won't have to worry about that.

Dwyane Wade
"Congts 2 1 of the greatest human beings I know "C Booz". Chicago just won w/ U.."

How I See It: I think Chi-town would have been a bit happier with you.

Chris Bosh
"I see ESPN has a name for the show tomorrow... "The Decision". I know I'm going to watch it! #freeagency continues..."

How I See It: With LeBron, you guys can't be beat. Have fun.

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